This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I still have a little drunk in my system
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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