i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize