In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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