I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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