If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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