youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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