Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
