Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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