Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
