A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
