can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
