People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
