69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize