Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
