How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
