I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
