The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
