Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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