Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
