So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
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