I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
what day is it and did you see me today?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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