in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize