i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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