i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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