I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
