thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
