remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize