friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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