Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
