can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
