Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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