I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
