I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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