i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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