She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
