hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
