You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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