no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
