I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I just found puke in my bra..
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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