Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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