What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
