some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
