Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize