yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
