you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize