Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
