Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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