oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
