Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I have aggressive nipples.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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