I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
